I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
it was like eating out sand paper
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
