I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
