We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
