Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize