..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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