god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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