walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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