What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
