my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
