Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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