The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
