I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize