Non-Jews are for practice
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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