My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
That's when you crack a 10am beer
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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