put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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