Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
