Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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