He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
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