the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
