Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
