About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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