and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
