who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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