JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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