You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
