Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize