I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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