how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
we're making bets on your personal life
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
