Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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