THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
