i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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