cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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