wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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