Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
