"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
