he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
