I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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