3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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