a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
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