forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Buhtt sex?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
