Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

garbage

(248): View more from Michigan

garbage dick

(847): View more from Illinois

rubbish cock

(248): View more from Michigan

you win

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(847) garbage (248) garbage dick (847) rubbish cock (248) you win http://tfl.nu/0jjx

Replies (3) Good night (2410) Bad night (812)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...

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(732): Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken... http://tfl.nu/8g1q

Replies (55) Good night (9497) Bad night (1307)
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(386): View more from Florida

I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.

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(386): I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to. http://tfl.nu/dqrr

Replies (44) Good night (1836) Bad night (5527)
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(678): View more from Georgia

I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.

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(678): I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night. http://tfl.nu/yws8

Replies (9) Good night (8500) Bad night (809)
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(313): View more from Michigan

I did the walk of shame to church this morning.

(734): View more from Michigan

hooker boots and all?

(313): View more from Michigan

Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.

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(313): I did the walk of shame to church this morning. (734): hooker boots and all? (313): Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway. http://tfl.nu/9ht9

Replies (14) Good night (7123) Bad night (941)
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(713): View more from Texas

I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.

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(713): I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan. http://tfl.nu/gm7k

Replies (11) Good night (1560) Bad night (4541)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now

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(+44): I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now http://tfl.nu/a890

Replies (3) Good night (1231) Bad night (535)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

I'm drinking too much free beer

(508): View more from Massachusetts

Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.

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(651): I'm drinking too much free beer (508): Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible. http://tfl.nu/a7hm

Replies (14) Good night (2378) Bad night (1070)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.

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(248): Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime. http://tfl.nu/xtk5

Replies (11) Good night (2265) Bad night (580)
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(713): View more from Texas

I just got carded by a ten year old.

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(713): I just got carded by a ten year old. http://tfl.nu/ytwr

Replies (5) Good night (799) Bad night (845)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.

(1-603): View more from New Hampshire

You fucker.

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(603): Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age. (1-603): You fucker. http://tfl.nu/7pi3

Replies (6) Good night (1237) Bad night (414)
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(386): View more from Florida

I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over

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(386): I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over http://tfl.nu/gegy

Replies (3) Good night (950) Bad night (303)
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(773): View more from Illinois

okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.

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(773): okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis. http://tfl.nu/pm2x

Replies (2) Good night (261) Bad night (697)
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(713): View more from Texas

So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.

(936): View more from Texas

I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.

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(713): So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY. (936): I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating. http://tfl.nu/ukan

Replies (3) Good night (709) Bad night (225)
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(347): View more from New York

I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.

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(347): I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical. http://tfl.nu/o6lg

Replies (7) Good night (567) Bad night (221)

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