glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
it glows. i had to have it.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
