Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Randomize
