First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity