ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting