I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
