I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
