yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
