She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
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The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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