i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
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I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
soo... how was my night?
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