have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Drunk is not a location!
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
