So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
