Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
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